The Yes Girl

We’ve all been there (men too) to agreeing to everything that comes our way. That is my problem in life. 

“Hey we changed your schedule last minute thats cool right?” Yeah sure.

“Are you really ok?” Yeah

I’m a yes girl

I have a problem with telling people no. I don’t like to disappointment people or let them down. I feel as though I have to defend why I’m saying no. I can’t deal with seeing it in their eyes so I just go along with it.

I wasn’t always the yes girl believe it or not. When I was between 18-21 I was so much more assertive and more carefree. Confronting problems was never an issue to me. How people saw me never mattered because I loved myself more. So what changed?? I seriously ask myself this question all the time! I’m still not sure where I went wrong and how my personality changed so much. After while I got used to making others happy and forgot to do the same with myself. I started to put myself last. Instead of being the outgoing person I used to be, I started to be shy and sheltered. Now I worry if I upset others and jump to rescue the situation.

This is when I realized it was turning into a problem, especially when it came to my personality. When looking and thinking about it, it sends me into panic. Prioritizing my mental health has given me the courage to say no. Realizing that I needed help gave my strength to go down this journey. My boyfriend helped me realize that I was hurting myself more than helping myself when trying to help others. It made me sad that I got into this emotional state in my life but I was also proud of myself to getting to where I am now. It is an on going process and learning experience very similar to a roller coaster ride. I’m excited to see where I go from here and truly spending time with myself!

 

One thought on “The Yes Girl

  1. As I read your post I thought for a minute it was one of mine! I did the same things you did, including the same personality changes. I think mine started when much new husband and I moved far away from my and his families. But then he started to change due to undiagnosed diabetes which caused a stroke later. But he became emotionally abusive. I didn’t know as much as he did; I hadn’t read as.much as he had, and finally I thought I wasn’t very smart, in spite of my being an ICU/CCU nurse for 17 years. After his death from heart failure at 58, I began to grow and become more assertive. It has been 9 years since his death. But I am stronger and wiser and more confident now.
    Examine past relationships for your loss of self worth. Did you make an unwise decision and decided to let someone else make decisions for you, just to be safe? These were the factors in my loss of confidence. I wish you the best. It takes time to undo bad habits and to learn how truly precious and invaluable you are. Hugs!!

    Like

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